THE GEORGE W. BUSH MISFILES

Now that the Confederate South has seen to the election of the most unqualified man ever to hold the office of President, I will begin to keep a weekly diary as a service to you, my devoted readers, so that you can keep track of just how far George W. Bush  is going to set this country back. Just remember, folks- I don’t vote for him,
and I begged you not to, either.
 

WEEK 1   |  WEEK 2   |  WEEK 3   |  WEEKS 4-6   |  WEEK 7   |  WEEK 8

WEEK 1 (1/20/01 to 1/27/01): Bush, Jr. immediately bans Federal funding of international Planned Parenthood organizations which provide abortion services to the indigent, ensuring that those who most need these monies will now have to resort to quacks and wire hangers. He also urges immediate action to begin oil drilling in protected Arctic wildlife preserves, apparently in a rush to cause environmental disasters that will dwarf even the Exxon Valdez and despite the Gallapagos disaster. Our new Attorney General John Ashcroft makes George Wallace look like a liberal Democrat. And guess who is profiting most from the California power shortage? Why, it’s GWB, Jr.’s biggest campaign contributor, Enron, who has helped jack up prices for electricity by almost 1000%. 

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WEEK 2 (1/28/01-2/3/01): This week, George W. Bush has begun his war on the time-honored concept of Separation of Church and State. Proving that he is, in fact, in the pocket of the Radical Right, Dubbya used his Executive Powers and opened an office to provide government tax dollars for "faith-based" groups. In plain English- he’s giving your money to religious charities that you might not necessarily support. This is illegal, immoral, and most demonstrative of Bush’s innate stupidity. I know that I wouldn’t want one cent of my money going to any organization run or controlled by Pat Robertson or Jerry Falwell. Now, I have no choice in the matter. Further, Bush warned medical research facilities this week that he would have to consider whether to continue funding stem cell research on embryonic cells. Sure- let’s drop funding for a program which might end up saving the lives of billions of people, and instead give money to a bunch of hocus-pocus. Well, at least powerful Republican Senator Fred Dalton Thompson ("Die Hard 2", "Cape Fear") issued a strong rebuke, and told the President that he will not support such a cut in funding.

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WEEK 3 (2/4/01-2/11/01): Proof that a Bush promise is as phony as a $200 bill- after "absolutely promising" the international Jewish community during his campaign that America’s Embassy in Israel would "immediately" be moved from Tel Aviv to Jerusalem (to support Israel’s legitimate claim of sovereignity), Bush announced this week that he will have to reconsider. Too cowardly to admit he’s stabbing Israel in the back the first chance he gets, he used National Security Advisor Condoleezza Rice as his mouthpiece. Bush… er, I mean, Ms. Rice says the President first has to "consult with our friends in the region". Right. Presumably this means Moammar Qaddafi and Saddam Hussein. Defense Secretary Rumsfeld compounded stupidity with more stupidity, telling European allies that he wants to build a "Star Wars" missile defense system that will not only "protect" the 50 states, but our friends overseas. Great! Now, when the system malfunctions, it won’t just rain bombs down on us, but on Europe, too. And to show how completely without compassion the Bush administration will be, our new President closed down the Office of National AIDS Policy and the Office on the President’s Initiative for One America (Race Relations), both created by Bill Clinton. Of course, after complaints from both parties, Bush ordered the AIDS office reopened, citing a "mistake". But the office on Race Relations remains closed. Looks like we’ve replaced Slick Willie with George the Grinch.

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WEEKS 4, 5 and 6 (2/12/01 to 3/5/01) I apologize to my readers for the discontinuity in my GWB Misfiles. Unfortunately, in a blunder reminiscent of one that Dubbya himself might pull, I have… er, umm… misfiled… some of my Misfiles. So, here’s a brief overview of the Bush presidency over the past three weeks. Let’s see. First we started bombing Iraq again without cause. Then, Secretary of State Powell announced that the sanctions against Hussein’s regime will be eased, equivalent to an admission that Saddam won the Gulf War. Voicing dissent to this move- Bush himself, along with VP Cheney, Defense Secretary Rumsfeld, and just about everyone at the Pentagon. Hmm. Maybe Powell isn’t as bad as I thought, if he irks so many people in the administration with just one move. Bush also gave a speech before Congress to explain his tax plan, which earned rousing cheers from the public… until the next day, when Bush actually revealed the specifics of what would be cut. Some of the programs to be victimized- NASA’s Space Shuttle successor and the Intenational Space Station, Medicare, PSAL and Midnight Basketball for troubled youths, Welfare/Workfare and job training, the Federal Highway Maintenance Trust Fund, the Department of Energy’s Clean Alternatives program, and the NEA. Great!!! Cut funding for anything having to do with creating a future legacy, so that Joe Public has a little more to spend come this Christmas. After the Seattle earthquake, Dick Cheney alleged that FEMA’s Project Impact preparedness initiative (another Bush target) was ineffective… even though Seattle suffered not even one death due to the quake, and was able to keep damage to an amazing minimum. We now know for certain that Bush’s pals on the submarine USS Greeneville directly contributed to the deaths of 9 Japanese citizens, as evidenced by the apology of both the captain of the sub and the Admiral of the Pacific Fleet (but not our President). Just to show how much integrity and character Bush has brought back to the Oval Office- his daughter Jenna threw a wild keg party last weekend, where the underage drinking and accompanying chaos and destruction led to several arrests- including Jenna’s boyfriend. Jenna then called the Secret Service to bail her beau out of the drunk tank. Now that’s a very appropriate use of our Treasury Department, and woeful evidence that Bill Clinton was vastly superior to Bush in one vital area- he was a much better parent to his daughter. In closing, let’s not leave out that House Speaker Dennis Hastert’s son was arrested for DWI last night as well. Boy, those Republicans sure are excellent moral  barometers, aren’t they?

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WEEK 7 (3/6/01-3/13/01) - Wow. It only took 7 weeks for VP Dick Cheney to have his first major heart problem. Not that a bear him any ill will- I respect Cheney and I wish him only the best. But he was unwise to allow his personal ambitions to get in the way of this country’s best interests. Remember, he chose himself to be VP while acting as Bush’s campaign advisor, instead of selecting a candidate who would not have to be hospitalized every 6-8 weeks. It was also revealed that George Bush, Sr. clandestinely pardoned multi-millionaire tax defrauder Edwin Cox, Jr. on the last night of his presidency, without going through the Justice Department, and despite the Attorney General’s recommendation that pardoning Cox would be premature. Sound familiar? I don’t begrudge Bush’s father one bit for this act. The President has the absolute right to pardon anyone for any reason, without getting advance approval. Whether money changed hands (contributions from Cox’s daddy to Bush, Sr.’s war chest exceeded $250,000, and he even threw Junior another $30,000) is irrelevant. The same rules that applied to Bush in 1993 should apply to Bill Clinton today, and this sham of an investigation should end now. Oh, here’s something interesting. During Campaign 2000, a video tape of Dubbya’s secret debate preparations mysteriously showed up at the offices of Tom Downey, Gore’s debate coach. Downey stepped down to avoid the appearance of impropriety, and Gore performed poorly in the debates as a result. Well, it was revealed this week that this was not the "dirty trick" of a Gore "mole", as Bush, Jr. and his people alleged at the time. Rather, one of Bush’s own staffers, Juanita Lozano, stole the confidential materials from a safe in her own office, sending them to Downey in an attempt to sabotage Gore’s campaign. Lozano now faces 15 years in prison and a $750,000 fine. And we, my fellow Americans, face 201 more weeks of Bush’s ineptitude and incompetence. 

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Week 8 (3/14/01-3/20/01) Bush promises- PROMISES- the American people during his election campaign that if elected, he will support tougher industrial restrictions on carbon dioxide emissions. He hires Christine Whitman as EPA chief, who swears she will make sure this promise is kept. I think you can see what's coming, folks. Bush only took eight weeks to break his campaign pledge, deciding that he will not support legislation to reduce CO2. I quote Dubbya: "CO2 might not be as bad as people think." Right, and amputation is good for weight loss. He leaves his EPA director fuming (literally and figuratively), her cheese in the wind. He leaves planet Earth to deal with a rising water table, melting ice caps, and an atmosphere that will eventually be as thick and hot as Venus. And coincidentally, Bush has a big fundraising lunch with power brokers in the oil, gas and coal industry as he makes the announcement. Here's another genius at work. Spencer Abraham, the most supremely unqualified Secretary of Energy in U.S. history, announces that our country is in the midst of a growing energy crisis... the same week that OPEC is meeting to discuss whether to increase or cut oil production. Any guess as to what they decided at that meeting, after hearing this buffoon's statement? The U.S. will suffer a 4% drop in foreign oil sales, which will lead to higher gas prices, fuel shortages, and rolling blackouts throughout the country, including New York, this summer. Nice timing, Spencer... you jerk!!! But what do you expect? After Bush spends the 2000 campaign praising our wonderful economy, it takes him only 56 days to say, and I quote, "Our economy is sputtering badly". Dick Cheney joins his "boss" in the pessimism, declaring that we are in a recession although this is a fallacy of fact. Hey, anyone notice that their mutual funds and stock portfolios are a lot lighter lately? Well, if Bush wasn't going around spreading panic like an undisciplined moron, some of us might still be worth something. At least enough Republicans have seen the light to guarantee that the tax cut that Bush wants will not be passed (thank you, Nor'easterners, Specter and Voinovich). We avoid a return to voodoo economics for a little while longer. Now, to be fair, I always try to find at least one positive amidst the negative. The GWB administration did stop the airline mechanics strike for at least another 60 days, using the declaratory "cooling off" period power. That was a smart move. Smart enough to make me question whether Bush actually thought of it himself. Oh well, I'll give him the benefit of the doubt. For now.

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Week 9 (3/30/01-3/26/01)   Bully for Senator John McCain!!! Sick and tired of Bush’s promise-breaking, the senior Republican from Arizona has told Bush, in no uncertain terms, that he will bring the Republican legislative agenda to a grinding halt unless things change quickly. Among the issues that McCain is pushing for, which Bush vehemently opposes- overhaul of campaign finance rules, including a ban on "soft money" contributions; the right of patients to sue managed-care insurance companies in state courts; tougher purchase restrictions at gun shows; FDA regulation of tobacco products; and protecting consumer privacy on the Internet. The rumor is, should Bush not live up to his obligations and start doing what the American people want, McCain will run against Bush as an Independent candidate for President in 2004. I don’t know if I’d vote for him- he’s just a little too close to the religious right for my taste- but anything that saps votes away from Dubbya is OK in my book. Also quite unhappy is Secretary of State Powell, who is finding out that wearing a uniform is a lot easier than wearing a suit. Powell’s attempts to run his Department have been constantly thwarted and criticized by Bush and other members of his administration, including NSA chief Rice and Defense Secretary Rumsfeld. Powell’s desire to continue the Clinton administration’s North Korea policy was shot down. Powell desperately wanted those CO2 regulations that Bush promised to support during his campaign, and then reneged on 2 months into his term. Powell wants to let Europe create its own army to handle European matters internally- Bush said no way, that’s NATO’s job. Powell wants lighter sanctions against Iraq, because civilians are being too adversely affected- Capitol Hill Republicans lambasted him for this view. And of course, Powell supports abortion rights and affirmative action, which makes him persona non grata in Bush’s inner circle of right-wing fanatic friends. Powell is beginning to realize that he probably should have accepted Democratic overtures- at least his views would have been respected, instead of berated. John Ashcroft made a slight boo-boo this week- he blamed the 2nd California shooting on video games and violent TV. The shooter told police he had a personal grudge against the Vice Principal, whose negative recommendation led the Naval recruiting office to reject him.  Looks like Ashcroft caught himself a case of "foot-in-mouth" disease. Finally, Bush coined a new word this week- "Hispanically". As in, "This country needs more Hispanically owned businesses." Oh, boy. That’s right up there with Warren Harding’s "return to normalcy".

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Week 10 (3/27/01-4/2/01)   This week, a U.S. RC-12 reconnaisance plane on routine patrol crashed in the forests of Nuremberg, Germany on its way back to base, killing two American servicemen. Also, two F-15 fighter jets disappeared over the mountains of Scotland, 45 minutes into a training flight. Both pilots are assumed dead. On March 12th, five American soldiers and one New Zealand army officer were killed in Kuwait, when a U.S. Navy F/A-18 mistakenly dropped a bomb on them during a training exercise. On March 3rd, an Army C-23 Sherpa crashed in Georgia, killing all 21 people aboard. On February 12th, two Army Black Hawk helicopters collided during a training session in Hawaii, killing six soldiers. And of course, let’s not forget the U.S.S. Greeneville, the submarine which killed nine Japanese civilians because its crew had a late lunch. Now, let me get this straight. The Bush administration was supposed to improve our military after Clinton left office. Isn’t that what Bush himself promised during his campaign, over and over and over again? To restore our fighting forces and bring them out of disrepair? Gee, I don’t know what the rest of you might think, but six fatal crashes in less than nine weeks, caused solely by the negligence and/or incompetence of out own troops, does not sound like improvement to me. At this pace, there will be 140 fatal accidents during the four-year Bush term. I don’t recall more than 20 accidents during the entire 8 years of the Clinton presidency. Funny. People complained that Clinton the "draft dodger" would run our military into the ground. Truth is, whether you agree with the politics of the Serbia conflict or not, Clinton is the first President to fight and win a war without using or losing any ground troops to do it, a military accomplishment of epic proportions. Another truth is, Bush is the draft dodger, having reaped the benefits of family influence and wealth to secure a cushy Air Force Reserve slot during the Vietnam War. Clinton haters don’t want to hear it, but it is an indisputable and documented fact that Bill Clinton submitted his name to the Selective Service, and simply had the good fortune not to have his number picked. While I’m at it, a review of Pentagon expenditures completed this week reveals that the multiple successes of Al Gore’s program to eliminate wasteful spending have already been reversed by Bush. We the tax payers are again being rooked- our military is back to its old prodigal habits, spending $400 for a $20 toilet seat, and $80 each for screws that sell for 10 cents apiece at your local hardware store. I’ll say it again, folks- don’t blame me, I didn’t vote for him.

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WEEKS 14-26 (4/3/01-4/23/01) My apologies, loyal readers, for the gap in updating the site. My Webmaster, who does all of my updating for me, was slightly occupied by the birth of his beautiful daughter, so I thought I’d give him time to become accustomed to his new and various responsibilities. Well, it’s been an interesting three weeks, hasn’t it? We got our spies back from China, and they’re alive, which is nice. But what the hell is Bush thinking? First, he kowtows to the Chinese government, saying that he’s "very sorry" for the incident. Excuse me… our plane was in international waters, the Chinese planes try to force it down illegally, one of their pilots dies because of his own overconfidence (and, as it turns out, incompetence), and our President apologizes? I’ve heard it said that Clinton was weak on foreign policy. But he never apologized to any other nation during his eight years in office for something that wasn’t our fault. To make matters worse, the Chinese intelligence agencies are now crawling all over that plane and learning about our no-longer-Top Secret technologies. I could hear Chinese President Jiang Zu Min laughing from here when Bush asked for the plane back. On the environment front, first Bush says he will support restricting CO2 emissions via the Kyoto Protocol, then he breaks his campaign promise. Next, Bush says he’s not going to enforce the Clinton administration’s tough arsenic restrictions. Then, he changes his mind "after further review". Oh, and after promising his own party that he will overturn Clinton-supported regulations on energy-efficient washing machines and water heaters, wetlands protection, lead reporting and nutrition labeling on meat and poultry, he backs off, deciding that Clinton’s ideas have merit after all. And they say that Clinton couldn’t give a straight answer? Give me a break. And now, here’s a real kicker. The President is having a fight with his own brother Jeb, the Governor of Florida, over exploratory oil drilling just off the Panhandle. Jeb doesn’t want the Federal Government to sell any oil-drilling rights in the region, because he is worried (and rightly so) that his state’s beaches will be ruined and tourism adversely affected, and even more worried (and even more rightly so) that he will not be re-elected if this drilling comes to pass. Brother George told Jeb "tough luck". How’s that for brotherly love? Of course, George didn’t have the guts to tell Jeb himself- he had Gale Norton do it for him (George knows that Jeb would never hit a girl). Hey, if GWB is willing to destroy the entire Arctic Circle with Alaska drilling, then why not the Gulf of Mexico? Hmm. I wonder if Jeb wishes now that he’d asked for a re-vote last November. If his brother had lost, there’s no way Gore would have allowed oil drilling in the Gulf, and Jeb wouldn’t have these problems. Finally, after promising the Radical Right during Campaign 2000 that he would fight hard to take away a woman’s right to choose, Bush decided that discretion is the better part of valor. He announced that he will not make abortion a priority issue during his administration, and that he will not appoint any activist anti-abortion judges to the Supreme Court bench. The American people should be thankful for this change of heart. But those who voted for Bush because of that promise should remember that they have been stabbed in the back, lied to with a straight face, and made to look like fools.

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WEEKS 11-13 (4/24/01-07/22/01) Hello, one and all, and welcome back to the GWB Mis-Files!!! Sorry that I’ve abandoned my readers for so long, but I’ve had a lot going on for the past few weeks. I’ve moved to a new apartment (OK, so I only relocated 3 blocks away, but hey, it’s a 5th floor walk-up, and I’ve accumulated a lot of stuff). I visited Lovely Lucie for a wonderful week in Vienna, and she reciprocated with a blissful week here in NYC (dukuji mnohokrat, muj krasna kocicka). Add that to the usual lawyer thing, musician thing, and so on and so forth, and you realize that I haven’t had too many free seconds to devote to my web site. Well, that’s all over now. Sooooooo… anything exciting happen while I was away? Just kidding!!! First, let’s all say thank you to the heroic Senator Jim Jeffords, who finally told Bush what he could go do with himself. Amazing- when Jeffords told Bush he wold leave unless things changed and moderate issues were addressed, the President, so stupid that he must have thought it was a joke, said, "Sorry you feel that way. It’s been nice knowing you." Although Jeffords has chosen to remain independent, he plans to vote with the Democratic and moderate bloc. This pretty much guarantees that the national nightmare of a Bush agenda will never come to pass. Trent Lott, Strom Thurmond, Jesse Helms and the other stormtroopers have lost their juice. And possible defections of Lincoln Chafee and John McCain loom on the not-too-distant horizon. Hey… does anyone remember what I wrote in my web editorial, "Powerless Presidency"? Am I good, or what? Just to make matters more complicated for the guy who can’t handle complicated things, it looks like he’s going to veto the very popular patient’s rights bill. McCain, of course, would be furious. His attempt to sell "Star Wars" to Europe ended in abyssmal failure- trust me, I was in Austria when he addressed the EC. Europe’s leadership has absolutely no respect for or confidence in Dubbya (that is, if I translate my German and Czech newspapers correctly). And the press over there lampoons him far worse than their American counterparts (c’mon, you political cartoonists, the gauntlet has been thrown). Attorney General John Ashcroft had to come forward and admit that the Brady Bill on gun control is actually working, reducing sale of weapons to felons and those with convictions for violence. David Brock, the man who helped get that genius of jurisprudence Clarence Thomas on the Supreme Court bench under Bush the Elder’s rule, admitted that he lied about everything he said about Anita Hill. Let’s see our current President try to get someone like Thomas on the Court the next time there’s a vacancy. VP Cheney needed a pacemaker put in (Lord help GWB if Cheney has to step down- a possibility which the VP is actually being forced to confront). And Bush’s beer-guzzling daughters… well, they’re young and stupid, and we all know where the stupid came from. I’ll be back soon with more little nuggets of joy. But I think it’s pretty clear, after this first six months, that George W. Bush is well on his way to becoming the worst Chief Executive in the history of this great nation. In the meantime, I think I’ll go splurge with the extra $3 I got in my paycheck. Thanks for the big tax cut, Mr. President! 

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